Advice for dating older man

Older men, it seems to me, are like gold dust on the dating scene right now.From salt-and-pepper George Clooneys to silver-fox Harrison Fords, young women are swooning over smooth older men more than ever.I romanticized a story about an adult man kidnapping, molesting, and raping an adolescent girl.None of that stuff happened to me, but I still wince when I remember how I idealized the thought of someone being single-mindedly obsessed with me the way the novel’s narrator is with Lolita.(Um, probably don’t do this, you guys.) It wasn’t like I was stupid. But I didn’t have enough experience or wisdom (as opposed to intelligence) to completely understand what I was getting into.I thought I was totally prepared to deal with the daily realities of having a boyfriend who was older than me by a decade-plus, which turned out to be less than correct.By Amy Rose Spiegel One of the most frequent Just Wondering questions we get here at Rookie is some variation on the following: “I’m a teenager and I’m thinking about dating/am intensely attracted to a person who’s significantly older than me. ” Well, as someone who not only has always been interested in older dudes, but has also dated quite a few of them, I have some things to say about your situation, question-askers.When I was 15, I was dating a 28-year-old (cue gasping).

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First, being attracted to older guys is completely and totally normal.It's when you think of dating as auditioning a potential soulmate that it becomes fraught with anxiety, unpleasantness, and emotional danger. I'm interested in learning what we do and don't have in common, and which of the divergences matter a lot.Plus, the writer in me loves hearing people's stories, and first dates are a great way to learn a huge amount in an hour, because it's expected that we share our stories.I do want to bring more male energy into my life, get to know men who are not already in my sphere of friends, enjoy a new companion.There's a lot of joie de vivre in me, and I'd like to share that.You never know when you’ll find love – it often comes from the most surprising places.

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